Get to “I Love You” – Part 1
One of the principles I (sometimes) use in structuring a story is: Get to “I love you.”
Have you ever seen Billy Wilder’s great 1960 love story, The Apartment? The classic ending line (from Shirley MacLaine to Jack Lemmon) as they sit down to a one-on-one game of gin rummy is, “Shut up and deal.” By which she means, “I love you.”
If you and I as writers can start our story with two people (preferably potential lovers) as far apart as possible and bring them, by story’s end, to the place where they can say, “I love you” … we’ve got something.
It doesn’t have to be literally, “I love you.” In fact, it’s better if the line or lines are as different from that as we can make them … as long as our readers or moviegoers understand that the words mean exactly that.
In the movie Fight Club, the narrator/hero without a name (played by Edward Norton) forces Marla Singer (Helena Bonham Carter) onto a bus leaving New York City. He and she have been clashing, crazy, we-can’t-make-this-work lovers throughout the picture. Now he’s stuffing cash into her hand and compelling her to get out of town to protect her from some bad stuff that’s about to happen.
Marla mounts to the first step of the bus, then turns back to Norton.
MARLA
“Tyler, you’re the worst thing that ever happened to me.”
Meaning, “I love you.”
DO THE WORK
Steve shows you the predictable Resistance points that every writer hits in a work-in-progress and then shows you how to deal with each one of these sticking points. This book shows you how to keep going with your work.
THE AUTHENTIC SWING
A short book about the writing of a first novel: for Steve, The Legend of Bagger Vance. Having failed with three earlier attempts at novels, here's how Steve finally succeeded.
NOBODY WANTS TO READ YOUR SH*T
Steve shares his "lessons learned" from the trenches of the five different writing careers—advertising, screenwriting, fiction, nonfiction, and self-help. This is tradecraft. An MFA in Writing in 197 pages.
TURNING PRO
Amateurs have amateur habits. Pros have pro habits. When we turn pro, we give up the comfortable life but we find our power. Steve answers the question, "How do we overcome Resistance?"
Thank you so much dear Steve.
My book ends up to be different from that, no lovers at the end (only the absence and desire for love, that is dusty though, like those old shelves), not even war is brewing although it should be so, only neutral dark and the knowledge that there should be more than just meets the eye. And the idea of putting in that end the great crescento is disgusting. The very crescento that everything must lead to seems like a damned mistake. I wonder many times, is that Resistance that tells me this thing? Along with disrupting me all the time, which seems to be Her? There is something else too, the fact that a “big, big” ending is nothing but another copy. Is there any big ending in the universe of movies and books that’s no copy?
So how do we end? What is the Real I Love You scene?
Maybe the Muse can’t help us always. Ah, I read Socrates’ Apology a couple of weeks ago. He says he met himself with all the inspired writers to see if they were wise. And to his surprise he found no wisdom in them, only the Muse leading them, but he considered the Muse as no wisdom but as only an external help, a flow that some people are gifted with, as far as I can tell.
So where do we go with those books? Should the Muse lead them or should our wisdom lead them? Wisdom is infinite so it can’t be wholly brought forth. Only pieces. Small pieces. Maybe even big pieces? The Muse alone can bring all forth or only a portion?
One part of me now condemns the flow in writing. The flow can bring beauty and structures based on our energies, but they may be not actual wisdom, only glimpses of wisdom.
So where do we seek wisdom? And how can it set itself before and stronger than the natural flow and the Muse? They seem to me to stop each other.
Ah, this was an instinctive answer so don’t mind my chaotic thoughts.
By the way, I love both “I love you” moments. Wish I had such to hold on to in this small life of “extreme realism”, like one good old friend once described it. Behind the wall of aggresiveness in both quotes, the expressing nature of the women shows but doesn’t offer the burning heart that is open for wholly accepting the man. Do you see the opposites in conflict? The wall and the heart. Together they may structure all the drama of life. Like mr. Rohn said, opportunity mixed with difficulty. Well symbolized some moments, but like you said, paraphrasing Telamon: “It’s one thing to symbolize life, and another to symbolize life’s life.”
Thank you, Steve.
This was great. Thank you Steven.
I avoid reading love stories. Don’t know why. Just don’t have any attraction to them. Same with movies and songs.
The multiple meanings of love – having had conversations with close to 100 leaders about Love I’ve come to a knowing that there are many words for Love and that a mutual understanding of the vast array of meanings is a kind of tacit human agreement.
Even folks who were very anti the word love would reach a greater awareness of the range of possibilities.
Most people miss the fact that Fight Club is a love story.
This post is very relevant to what Im working on. Appreciate you.
My all time favorite from Monsters Ball, when, after Billy Bob Thornton spoons chocolate ice cream into Halle Berry’s mouth and says, “I think we’re gonna be alright” Brilliant!
“I’m not paying this back. I consider it asshole tax.”
These words give a guy hope that she does care!
👏👏👏
God you’re good. You nailed it. So enjoy reading your weekly and this has to be, for me, your best. So much in so few words. And that’s your point. Thanks
Holy cow! Was that what my old girlfriend was saying…I missed it completely! That was 50 years ago….Bummer.
I finally got around to checking out your interview with Mark Manson. It was either finish the book or watch. Finished the book, no apologies. Thank you, thank you for that interview and for writing Wednesdays. You give me hope. Looking back on the year so far, I realized I’m not doing as bad as I thought. No matter the circumstances, I stuck with this crazy creative life.
The creative life is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me:)
When I started writing my book I was disgusted at its grotesque sight, sound, and shadow. I just couldn’t imagine kids and a white picket fence with Frankenstein. But as I kept sitting down to write she began to slowly emit an enchanting aesthetic. Our dialogue is now turning matrimonial. Love is in the air!
Amazingly written, Thanks for sharing this with us.
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Thank you for sharing this! It’s very helpful and exactly what I needed.
This passage subtly shows that love is not just about words but also about actions and deep emotions between two characters.
Great post! I really appreciated how you broke down in such an accessible way. Your insights were particularly helpful, and I’m looking forward to applying some of these ideas in my own work. Thanks for sharing your expertise and giving us practical takeaways. Keep up the great work!
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