Working for the Man
We asked in last week’s post, “What do we do differently when we quit working on the assembly line at Ford Motor Company and go into business (or art or craft) for ourselves?”
Answer: We do exactly what we did when we worked for Ford, only instead of Ford telling us what to do, we tell ourselves.
Instead of the Man setting the agenda, we set it.
We decide what our goal is—and how we intend to reach it. We decide how much we’re willing to sacrifice to reach that goal. We decide how many hours we will work (our total, bank on it, will be much higher than it was at Ford) and how many weeks and months per year.
We decide where we will work. We decide when. And with whom.
We decide what time we get up and what time we go to bed. We assign our own vacations and our own days off. (We also assign all-nighters and working weekends.)
We alone will be the arbiters of our success. We’ll set the terms ourselves (they may be quite different from conventional measures of success.)
We’ll give ourselves a raise if we deserve it. And we’ll kick ourselves in the butt when we screw up.
We will be our own boss, our own mentor and teacher and psychiatrist.
Can we make that mental shift? Can we flip that switch in our head? Can we go from working for the Man to being the Man?
If our goal is to be a writer or an artist or an entrepreneur, we can’t do it any other way.
DO THE WORK
Steve shows you the predictable Resistance points that every writer hits in a work-in-progress and then shows you how to deal with each one of these sticking points. This book shows you how to keep going with your work.
THE AUTHENTIC SWING
A short book about the writing of a first novel: for Steve, The Legend of Bagger Vance. Having failed with three earlier attempts at novels, here's how Steve finally succeeded.
NOBODY WANTS TO READ YOUR SH*T
Steve shares his "lessons learned" from the trenches of the five different writing careers—advertising, screenwriting, fiction, nonfiction, and self-help. This is tradecraft. An MFA in Writing in 197 pages.
TURNING PRO
Amateurs have amateur habits. Pros have pro habits. When we turn pro, we give up the comfortable life but we find our power. Steve answers the question, "How do we overcome Resistance?"
Beginning to answer to ourselves. Great post.
There’s something we need to keep in mind if we do this: we’re both the boss and the employee, and those are two very different roles.
The boss handles scheduling, project selection, pitching, finances — all the planning and decision-making. The employee does the actual work: writing, creating, executing.
Some people are naturally better at one than the other. But to be an artist/writer in the way you describe, you need to be good at both.
And there will be days when you’ll just want to be the employee — to focus only on the work — but your choices mean you also have to be the boss.
MK, This is such and important acknowledgement in becoming the WOMAN in alignment with both your personal and professional needs. One is always more dominant than the other, thus you must learn to lasso the softer one in order to redirect her to become stronger in her portion of the creative process.
Thank you
From working for the Man to being the Man. Ah, what a liberating thought! Although the emotion this sense of freedom includes is misleading. The Man out there, who has experience and has led the industry where he puts us to work for him, has already set a very steady system. In contrast, we as the Man must set a system anew – and the other Man has experienced how difficult this is. In fact, it was so difficult for him, that:
(a) he failed for decades, or his ancestors failed for decades, in order for the enterprise for him to be ready and working.
(b) when we work for him, the Big Brother, our priviledges are actually *the least possible* (even I feel surprised by this conclusion here). They are not 0, or we won’t stay. But they are far from 1 because then the neighboring Big Brother or Big Sister will give their workers less, keep more for their priviledge, and thus become more strong and crash the system of the Big Brother who gives the workers something closer to 1 (1 equals full).
So the cost of freedom is not full then! Freedom needs wisdom also. And the cost of wisdom must be payed one way or another.
Wisdom is so wide that being wise in one area is never enough. It seems so: every leader out there wants to give us the solution to one area alone. But what about depression? Lack of money? Terrible people around us? Children that we must protect from mediocrity and failure? Relatives who gave us our Life, damn, who is more important than them, and how can we support them? Dreams? Dissabilities? Inabilities? Even cooking!? Diseases? Errors?
Damn, we must be the Man. And that Man, us, has a hell to do. Much more than we can think of in the beginning.
Let’s go. Every minute waisted is against our own Man. Us. Trials and errors and seeking the truths on all fields.
Thank you so much dear Steve.
Many of us will fail. I conclude subjectively that this race is beyond our capacities, and although there are brilliant examples of those who achieved the miracle, if we look between the lines we will see the factor of luck being very strong also in those cases. Many must have tried and failed. I struggle 20 years exactly now for the “dream”, I have so many advantages like great mentors and time and help, yet I still can’t achieve basics. So from that basis of experience I can imagine how hard will it be for the many to reach the End, the dream, eventhough many of them try hard.
I have seen it in my family, elsewhere: they fought hard. Their lives though failed much more than they deserved. I saw and see crushed down gentle and so strong souls that raced and tried so hard for so many decades. Your life also my dear Steve, before the big successes. My friends also, some have no hope for an at least decent future. I sent 9 euros yesterday to a great childhood friend because he can’t buy a cream for his pains in the back and the chest.
Ah, thoughts tumbling. We must reach the End.-
Você é um grande mentor. Obrigado
This post, divine timing. I retire in 2 mos., 5 days , 11 hours …. Yes, the countdown has begun, only to become The Man??? Exhilarating or terrorizing thought that is. Thanks again for your insight and for pouring cold water in my face at 5 am.
I’m living the dream now and have been for a while. So is my brother.
It is as you describe it, Steve. But, it is.
Best,
Jürgen
I love it, this is a great reminder that we ourselves are the MAN, we ourselves DECIDE ❤️
How do we do this though, the self management. How do I be the plan maker, executioner, critic. This something i struggle with. Anyone that has beat it I’d love to know how
Great advice, Steven. Easier said than done, as the saying goes. Unfortunately, there are so many problems encountered in life, psychological, family relations (who should all be told to go to hell, anyway), social conformity, making a living, etc that it is hard for an artist to be true to his calling and duty. It is no wonder that JD Salinger turned his back on the world and went to live in his retreat in New Hampshire, though rereading his work, I find there is something lacking in it, but I am no critic.
By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be the boss and work twelve.-Robert Frost
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you’re still a rat.-Lily Tomlin
I would rather be a failure at something I love to do, than be a success at something I hate. – George Burns
The greatest joy at being your own boss is quality control. You don’t have to sell something you don’t believe in. I’ll take the hard road to do that.
I believe Steven hits the nail on the head with this.
This is a tough one to read right now because I’m not “the man” of my own destiny. Very good timing though – I appreciate your work Steven! I very much appreciate these weekly emails too!
I’m struggling with this right now after retiring several years ago. I also think I may be undiagnosed ADHD because without the structure and time constraints of a job I am just floating through the days. How to give yourself structure and deadlines that stick seems impossible to me. My only deadline now appears to be death. I am beyond dissappointed in myself and my inability to pull my book together. I have no support or accountability that I can feel.
Appreciate your enouragment in my inbox.
Dear Mary,
Your writing is very thoughtful, caring, sensitive and beautiful. You are an amazing human being.
Mary… a psychological term I’ve heard used (which resonates for me) is “approach avoidance.” The object/goal/situation (our writing, painting, asking someone out on a date) contains both reward and punishment. Attraction/repulsion. I think of this when Steve talks about Resistance. He points out “the more important our project, the closer it is to our heart, the greater the force of Resistance.
The attraction/reward: creating something that reflects our inner vision, creating something that illuminates something about our human experience, something that creates a connection between our own inner experience and the interior experience of others (our readers, viewers, fellow humans).
The repulsion/punishment: what if I don’t get it right, what if I sound juvenile, what if others know more about this topic than I do, what if I’m not good enough. That’s the voice of Resistance that Steve talks about.
You know what’s always been helpful to me (with the admission that I have no where near mastered this)? What’s been helpful when working on a long-form piece of writing? Picturing one person to whom you want to tell your story. Is there a person in your life who, when you’re speaking, always leans in. Always rests her chin on her fist and says, “Interesting. And then what happened?”
You’re not telling your story to an auditorium full of judgy strangers. You’re telling your story that one friend who never breaks eye contact with you, never looks to see who else is at this party. Tell your story to that one friend who says, “And then what?”
Dear Mary,
I hope you’re seeing these responses from such thoughtful readers. You’ve struck a nerve in us all!! You’re most definitely not alone. My hope and wish for you today is that those thoughts pass like the clouds. Resistance be GONE!
Dear Mary,
I am very sad that this darkness strikes us all. I can feel and understand your disappointment. I felt like an ADHD all my life. Now I know: it was because of lack of communication and of reading plenty of books to me in my younger age. I never learned to connect ideas. I only made up for it many years after I was inspired to read many kinds of books and find many good ideas. Like I said to a friend some weeks ago, read The Artist’s Way by miss Cameron. In it is a simple but smart as it can get technique that will blow your awareness and inner ballance and thoughts, and it’s easy for anyone to do.
Good luck.
Mary,
You say that “You have no support or accountability that I can feel.”
I have found that this community offers more support than family does at times. And as Kate mentions, Steve posted an interview with Andrew Huberman, How to Overcome Inner Resistance on YouTube. It is worth watching.
From a personal standpoint, when faced with what seems like an overwhelming task, I break it down into smaller pieces. As an example, I had to clean my parents home. My parents were accumulators. I had to break the task down to not one room at a time but even smaller as to one closet at a time. The task took me three years before the house could be put on the market.
Please do NOT talk yourself out of doing what you are here to do. There is only one you. What you have to say is important.
Thank you 🙏 for being voice of reason in world full of noise
Setting up some kind of outside accountability, and an objective view of your work, is crucial. Created a writer’s workshop.
I loved your conversation with Andrew Huberman, Steven! I listened to it at work over the last two days. My biggest takeaway from today’s Writing Wednesdays post and your podcast episode is this: Being pro means showing up. One day the self-doubt will lesson. Show up. Do it anyway. If your energy is pulled in a million directions due to work, family, health issues, etc. Give yourself some grace. 20 minutes may soon turn into 2 hours. I think loving the creative process for its intrinsic value is key. Everything else is extra. Do it for you.
*lessen
Wishing everyone a productive day. I’m going to take a walk at lunch to organize my ideas. Moving helps…
Thanks, All, Everyone! I feel I’m in a workshop, and a circle of supporting arms. We have been in a “Fall Cleanup” here at home and I get physically and mentally tired putting up new curtains, sorting books to give away, laundry that has piled up, getting meals on the table and dishes done before bed, renewing a friendship and getting the guestroom ready for company. I keep looking for the Song in all of this, winding up for a bit on YouTube for funny Irish Pub Songs to feed both. May sound like not much effort, but I slept better last night, and slept late today, maybe I fed my soul some encouragement porrige!
Steve, thank you for the continuous inspiration. I am a published author and writer transitioning from a tennis professional to a writer. I have much to share, for I am leading a unique life. Daily, I fight the resistance. The fight, in an odd way, makes me stronger and more determined. Vamos!
I am a big AA12 step guy. I have one basic problem, self centered fear. All my disturbances traced to this to this root. The only thing this produced was terror, which gave birth to my other defects, my failed attempts to deal with my fears. Recovery was simplified: search out, expose, and let go of anything that keeps me sick, and then help others do the same.
Bang on.
This made me laugh, in a way – and feel proud, in a way – and really encouraged for everyone who has yet to discover this path for themselves. I’m a woman, former wife, current mom/grandma – and since 1989 I’ve also (in Steve’s parlance) been “The Man.” That’s when I set off in all seriousness on my journey as an entrepreneur grants trainer in the nonprofit world – and never looked back. (Also quit smoking the same week which in retrospect was a really … befuddling … timing choice but it all worked out 🙂). And three years ago I semi-retired to turn my workday focus to fiction writing – now have two novels with an agent and out on submission. It’s a HARD HARD HARD path. Honestly, you stop working for THE Man and every one of your clients becomes their own Man. So there’s that. But if that’s the journey that’s in your blood, there’s no denying it and no going back and the fierce determination to see it through – with the help of Providence – will see you through. At almost 73 and after 36 years going solo, I cannot imagine my life otherwise.
Maryn,
Wishing you the best with the novels. Thanks for the inspiration.